The right balance in life is not too much thinking, but just enough

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Imagine using what you consider a disability to your advantage?  If you play it well, say by underplaying it, it could become your biggest asset.
A slight attention deficit disorder is not the end of the world and has advantages you might not have though of.  For instance, it can make you be able to jump lines of thinking quickly.  This is a key factor in leading innovation, creativity and innovative thinking.   I bet you didn’t know that typically, dyslexic people have better peripheral vision than most?   In a public environment, say when speaking to a large group, you are more aware of looks your attendance shows.  For instance you can catch glimpse of boredom, surprise, restlessness and other cues that help you keep their attention engaged.  , and have learned to respond to these in real time.  In other words, dyslexia makes you more sensitive to people’s facial and body language and use to to decode the messages.
Another lesser known fact is that people with Aspergers Syndrome, AS are natural observers and can become great executives who can see the greater picture in a dispassionate way, then figure out what works and what doesn’t. If people with AS have a hard time connecting to others, they are great at getting others to connect.  This is also another  key aspect of leadership.  You stutter?  Then you can develop a deep, reflective, halting style to not only compensate, but also make you look thoughtful and deliberate.  The list goes on and on.
And if you don’t suffer from ADD and other a la mode symptoms, than look at what you don’t like about yourself, then turn into a quality.  If you need help, I highly recommend reading Steve Job’s biography by Walter Isaacson.  I promise you will see the great Job in a different light than you already do.  As Dave Logan author of Tribal Leadership and The Three Laws of Performance  said, when done properly, the truth is that self-reinvention, when done properly, is embracing your innermost self. Only partial or flawed reinvention is changing what you don’t like.  I couldn’t have said it any better.

Finding your personal solution to your personal questions

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Nicolas Zart, ACCWhat most people truly want is to find their personal solutions to their problems.  What most people ask for are ready made answers and for someone to just give them what to do.

As a certified Coach, I get approached with concerns and problems followed by being asked what should the person do.  Without going into details about what Coaching is and isn’t, my first reaction is to find out what this person is really asking for and what does she or he really need.  The first question is a little tricky and will involve asking more questions to find if the person is asking a straight forward question or is there more behind and beneath the surface.

For instance, the most common concern is that of not being happy at work.  A consultant or adviser would jump at the invitation to advise on how to get out of a specific career followed by finding another job.  Yet, this doesn’t address the deeper issue at heart.  Why is this person unhappy with what once excited them?  What is missing here?  Further questioning usually reveals something has changed and most of the time that change is from within.  While sometimes we just outgrow our careers and turn to other ambitions, most of the time rekindling the passion within our current positions is as simple as taking a little distance and getting an overall view of the situation.

The second part is easier and consists of finding out what the person needs.  In both cases however, you will notice that only that specific person has the right amount of intimate knowledge of the overall situation to make the proper decisions.  After all, who knows you more and better than yourself?

Lastly, letting someone find their own answers and solutions is of vital importance.  It fosters confidence, creates greater awareness around who they are and how they function.  It mostly gives them the satisfaction that they know best who they are, can serve themselves and finally give enough confidence to take on life’s many challenges head on.

The only help anyone needs is finding their own unique ways of reaching those personal solutions.  This is where a professionally trained Coach proves to be of great value.

Easy criticism achieves little but blow steam off

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Being on edge makes you blow up for no intelligent reasons

Before getting mad, think it through

If you’re like me, you’ve noticed people are on edge and are quick to anger these days.  It isn’t easy for many and the economic situation is taxing more than one household.

I write for a few online outlets, that’s why my posts have been scarce here.  I’m also not trained as a journalist and I am not a reporter.  What we write is open and free to all, the money made at the Examiner and TorqueNews is nothing to sustain a career.

I recently wrote an article where I made obvious mistakes.  Blame it on going too fast, tired eyes and all the usual excuses but the reactions were harsh.  I tried not to take it personally but what bothered me most was the fact the comments were anonymous.  After all, this is free news and no one edits my articles.  It made me realize that people are on edge and lash out for almost any reason.

I should have caught the mistakes obviously, but everyone is welcome to write for an outlet and voice their views of the world.  In the end, it’s just one person’s point of view.  I sign my name and make no qualms about who I am.  I’m a WYSIWG person, what you see is what you get.

Before we criticize people, we need to take a breath and realize everyone sees life through different angles.  Everyone has ideas about what is right, what isn’t.  When I feel I’m about to blow up at someone, I try to catch the fact that I’m reacting to something much deeper that was triggered.  In the end, I have the problem and must deal with it.

What changed for me this time is that my replies were firm and direct.  I didn’t try to protect myself, nor justify anything.  I owned my mistakes and said anyone is welcome to write for anyone these days.  It felt good but boy, are people on edge or what?