Monthly Archives: June 2011

Learning via conversations, observations in an expert-free wrap group

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Wouldn’t it be nice to find like minded folks in an expert-free group setting, hearing and sharing with them observations about life and work in general?  What works, what doesn’t?  What is happening in our society?

How many of you are experiencing resistance?  How many of you leaders are experiencing blocks?  What are you observing?  What are you doing about it?

Learn in conversation, by sharing, by listening to each other in an environment free from experts, in a zone where where you can share and observe.

You can find us on LinkedIn under the Wrap Group under my Nick Zart profile.  You need to connect with me and I will invite you into the group.  It’s a private group, so that we can talk freely in an expert-free environment.  You can also find us on Facebook under Tap The Source and befriend me there to be invited.

Ready but not enough to move forward

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Feeling good after setting goals intelligently

Nick Zart

I’ve noticed over the past 4 years many people coming to me expressing great frustration at their lives and work but…

The gist is the frustration is understandable in almost everyone’s cases.  It’s hard to feel fulfilled when you are living someone else’s dream and the promise of riches that don’t always deliver eventually wear out.  Even for those who go on to wealth, more wealth is eventually needed creating an ever spiral of more and more and more until…  until the realization the nagging feeling never left.  So when is it enough?

The toughest thing you will have to do! Only 1% of those who express frustrations because their lives is not what it is supposed to be will actually do something about it.  The rest will complain until they have had enough.  So the question is, are you part of the 99% that live your life by default or the 1% that designs your life and lives by it.  Only 1% does it.  How do you get to that percentile?

What is the ultimate cost of staying where you are?

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This is a tough one and requires a serious, non-judgmental look inside.  What is the ultimate cost of staying the course you are on if you are not satisfied?

The gist is we all want to change but the reality is not many actually engage in the changing.  In fact, according to the survey, both formal and informal I have seen, only 1% of the people saying they want to change actually change.  So what is the issue?  The real question is how serious are you about changing, or in other words, how much is the discomfort level?  Without a strong discomfort coupled to a a serious commitment, we just wish taking no action.

So I ask you this, what is the ultimate cost for you to stay where they are, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, in your relationship, at work?  What other areas of your life can you discover where the cost outweighs the benefits of finally once and for all, being more and more yourself in any life situations?  Is there enough pain to actually move on?

The meek shall inherit the Earth

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Small but powerful One puzzling and recurring thought in many holy scriptures throughout our different civilizations is the central thought around the well quote Bible passage: “… and the meek shall inherit the Earth”

The gist is it finally dawned on me, the deeper meaning of this often misunderstood quote when we were traveling India reading about Ghandi’s life and the horrendous British subjugation of the country.

This little scrawny looking person, fiercely determined in his will and action made an empire with its mighty armies bow down.  If this doesn’t explain that, I don’t know what will.  Too bad it takes a person to achieve all of this but that society so readily disperses itself once that person is gone.  How easily society falls into the Machiavellic and divisive games of politicians…

Spiritual, religious? What does it mean anyway?

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As I’ve raised the question of spirituality at work these past few weeks, I noticed how people interchange religious with spirituality and vice versa.  Both are different, so how come the confusion?

The gist is spirituality and religious can be the same, spirituality encompasses religious, and sometimes, not the other way around.  It’s a question of connotations and how we view religious these days.

Spirituality versus Religious.  As with many, I find myself to be deeply spiritual but not religious at all.  The fact is for me, spirituality embraces the essence of religion and more.  Yet I noticed many people use both words to say the same thing and often time view the way I use spirituality as religious.

While in essence everything is spiritual, religious is a way of following a faith based system that is dogmatist.  The initial attraction might be spiritual, it usually ends in a closed system based on faith and patience.  Spiritual usual is more encompassing and can, or not take in parts or entire religious system.  Where the line blurs are with certain systems and ways that border on both lines.  Traditional Indian Buddhism is more a thought school that is spiritual in essence but where spirituality is not the main point.  Tibetan Buddhism aims squarely at spirituality and finding your personal deliverance via a series of systems that can be taken as whole, or parts.

Come to think of it, that is a very personal understanding of what spirituality is for me.  What is yours?  I’d be interested in hearing form you.

Celebrating a day without electricity

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There is something to be said about how addicted we get to modern amenities…

I woke up and saw no lights this morning.  Darn, thought I, no electricity!  I could feel my mind confronted with the choice of the usual chain fear reaction and the possibility to take time to observe the situation.  The thought was for catching up on work today.  I just hadn’t planed on no electricity.

After a few seconds of debating whether to freak out or not, I laughed and called it a day of celebrating no electricity.  So I read, went to the pool in the rented house we have and slept.  One other thing I am thankful for is that this family has an electric boat!

What drives you nut, enough to do something about it?

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Let me know if you feel like this.

Are you sick and tired of what you do day-to-day? Are you not fulfilled at work or personally?  Are you fed up with business as usual?  Do you find yourself taking on tasks that conflict with your personal values?

Many of us feel like that but what are we doing about it?  Let’s talk about what we can do about it in a group where there are no experts, where we can share in a safe environment to learn and observe from each other.

Let’s have virtual champagne, come and share your stories in a secret Facebook group under my Tap The Source page.  Once you find me under Tap The Source, befriend me and I will invite to this secret group where we can chat and brainstorm.

Let me know what you think.

Besides what you say, how serious are you about doing something?

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Goal setting by understanding who you are

Picture by Nick Zart

We love to help, we jump on the occasion to do so, but besides knowing if you are the right person is also how serious that person is doing about it.

The gist is sometimes we talk just to air out what we feel and don’t necessarily want to do anything about it.

When Is It Time To Do Something About It?  Coaches have to ask and find out what is the level of discomfort and how ready is a person ready to act on it.  This becomes crucial since the success of any results depends solely on how motivated you are.  You cannot change the conditions of what ails you if you are not committed to it.

Before helping someone to help you change, you need to find out how serious you are and what have you done, if anything at all.

Thank you grasshopper…

Am I the right person for you?

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One of the toughest questions a coach, or anyone else for that matter of fact has to ask is whether or not they are the right person to help in any given situation.

The gist is we can easily delude ourselves thinking we know best, even if it comes from a good place.  But what do we know best?  Who knows this best?  Best for ourselves, others, the world?  What is the measure?  Sometimes it also feels certain professionals find it easy to wing it as long as they get paid or they give back something of equal value.  But in the end, an honest hard cold look at whether or not you are the right person for the situation pays out in the long run.  Am I going on a limb here?

Often times, when talking to a potential new partner we eagerly want to help and feel know what’s best.  However, it pays to stop and ask whether we are the right person for them.  As a Coach, I am aware that if I approach the situation out of fear, lack or any other negative underlying emotion, then I know I’m off center and will not be able to make the right choice, nor find the one best suited.  By being centered and without personal agenda, save for their highest well being, you can then start to think about how you can be of help.  I know this sounds a little out there and even veiled with Buddhist principles but I’ve found that by being aware of myself, seeing my motives and then working for the highest benefits of all, situations work out for the best and especially become easy to maneuver through.

So next time someone comes to you for help, ask yourself if you are the right person by looking at your motivation.  Why are you saying yes… or no.