The first thing a client learns about is how everything is confidential in a coaching session.  Period!

I love getting in to that part with a potential client.  I love seeing the relief on their faces or in the tone of their voices.  However, it can be a drawback when people ask you for referrals.

One way I found to deal with this is to ask them to put themselves in the shoes of being a client and being asked to talk about the issues you discuss with your coach.  In other words, you have a potential client who asks you: "OK, it sounds great but I want to meet some of your clients."  You tell them that everything is confidential in a coaching session and that names and situation cannot be revealed unless otherwise permitted, which is rare depending on the sensitivity of the nature of the coaching relationship.  I usually ask them to think about being in a coaching relation ship with me and how would they feel if I would say to someone else that I have them as a client and we talk about this and that?  That usually gets their attention.

And it is a nice feeling knowing that nothing goes outside the coaching session.  You also get to share intimate things, if the time is right and the situation demands it.  It builds a bond and a relationship.  I know I feel very close and safe with my coaches because they know things about me and I know things about them.  Yet, the friendship line isn't crossed, or if it crossed, it well defined.

So using confidentiality as a selling tool is a good tool but you need to use it wisely.  Tell them about the confort and peace but tell them the same restrictions apply to referrals.