It’s obvious, to get things done having a coach by your side really helps.

I talk to people and I am always astounded to find those who have coaches and use them well, manage their time more efficiently. These people just get more done. “Personal coaching works extremely well to assist people to achieve incredible coaching goals that were not previously attainable by using the nine other major human improvement processes available.” This was taken from The Coaching Connection Blog.

Notice the “coaching goals” term in there? There are things a coach will not, or should I say a real coach will not touch, issues that would be best dealt with another professional. There are things I cannot go into because simply enough, I am not a trained psychologist or a trained counselor. I am a coach. I am to work with you moving forward helping you achieve your aspirations and goals. Simple enough.

Yikes, time slips by and I am feeling overwhelmed but in a good sense. It’s the sensation of having so many things to do and enjoying them. The question is how do I manage the time slots? Is that even the right question?

Lately, I have had one great idea after another, one good project after another and everything is going in the direction I want. Unfortunately, there are only so many of me and hours during the day. The feeling that is growing within me if I continue charging full steam ahead, I will either burn out or want to take off for a week or a weekend. I used to do this a lot. I used to go away to France for two or three weeks. However, with my time constraint and let’s be frank, I do think I want to spent $1000 to fly cramped in a small place for twelve hours with dubious service, I can’t take off as easily as I used to.

Being aware of this really gives me an edge compared to someone who just trudges along. However, I need to find an awareness and balance. One of the things I need to do is go to the library and chomp out a few hours on one project to ease the load. I have a few project and one that weighs pretty heavy both in terms of energy and expectation.

It always boils down to two things, awareness and balance. I find that my meditation time has been spent more thinking ahead and putting energy going forward then actually relaxing and centering myself. In other words, even though I have more quality personal time than most people, I don’t use it fully. At lest, I am aware I am not using in the way I want.

I also used to have a full day off or an afternoon or morning which I would spend at Polly’s working and going to The Belmont Athletic Club. I just don’t have time anymore. And just now it dawns on me that I haven’t worked out in a month.

So reflecting back, I need a more free flowing life. I need to have a better sense of my direction and not just general. I need to be more aware at every level why I am doing anything I do and what purpose it serves.

A funny case was brought up in our of our studies, how a person meaning well turns to the outside world for solace when she could do some soul digging and then turn to others to lend a hand.

It happens often. It’s often harder to look within that we would rather go out there and “help people”. It is a good feeling but often lacks a depth of self understanding. Unfortunately, you cannot help anyone until you have helped yourself, to a certain point, at the very least. Often times we find people meaning well, who are there to help anyone on the spot but we see a certain lack in their eyes. Sometimes this lack is the very thing they set out to help others with. The worse part is that it is hard to accept help from people who are not whole.

It is especially so when you have a client who “wants to do good” and wants to help others. I hear this very often and the question that comes to mind is why? What motivates you to do so? Sometimes the answer is true, genuine and is the result of years of self-searching. Sometimes however it betrays anguish and a desire to run away from the within.

It always goes back to the same thing, clean your home first before you clean someone else’s. Do a little soul search first before you go out there and help others. After all, you won’t have as much experience as you would need to cope with what you be presented. This was part of a discussion we had that not everyone is or can be a coach.

What coaches feel they contribute the most are increase in consciousness according to Choicer magazine.

I like that because with more awareness we make better decision and that leads to better quality of life. In a society where anything is quickly over-hyped, it’s easy to lose track of whether or not we are buying something we truly need or responding to an appealing advertising. Being in the present moment has often been an important ingredient of sports champions. It makes you more there, more aware and less prone to take a direction without knowing why.

ROI (return on investments) have been proven with many good coaches, and for those that haven’t seen that, please use a different coach. There are so many people out there and one relationship might not be the right fit. try on another one.

Go and check out Choice magazine. It’s a magazine geared for coaches and has a lot of quality articles.

There was a post on the Internet that compared the rise of coaching with the cosmetic surgery one, and squeeze of America’s corporate middle-management. It’s opened a lot of comments and I feel a real dialog can be established now. The white elephant is in the room.

It’s true, I thought coaching was just one of those fashion fads. After all, coach is that brutal sports guy who pushes you to do more. Why would I pay for this? Then I met Donna Schilder and I knew I was in front of something much bigger than I imagined. I wasn’t just being asked questioned for the sake of it, there was a method I didn’t understand but felt familiar with.

The dic coaches I met were equally great people. In fact, I still have never met one of those, I call them sticker coaches, those who just stick the title coach next to their names. Maybe this is why I am biased.

This post and its follow ups started with a verbal and opinionated Nancy Rommelman. There is a lot of harsh criticism, some justified and some I have never seen or experienced. The gist was basically:

“Is the stratospheric rise in life coaching due to the fact that anyone can be one?” Sure anyone can call themselves coach but the name alone doesn’t make one. You’re either a coach in your soul or you aren’t. I don’t think it can be taught. I can also call myself a preacher but it doesn’t guarantee me being a good one. What about those who take it seriously, go to school, work with coaches and really, truly are there to give the opportunity to experience the benefits they got out of coaching? Surely, it’s not a black or white world.

“Coaching, like behavioral drugs, promises a speedy recovery.” A coach who promises you a speedy recovery is a serious sign to run away. They would only get a snicker from me. That’s not what we do, period. In this litigious society, we would be sued left and right. This got me thinking about how coaches out there promise things they cannot do. You can’t promise results for someone else’s work, in any industry. Anyone who does is a rimal level salesman.

“…coaching strikes me as running parallel with the cosmetic surgery industry: we should all appear flawless, as quickly as possible.” I can smell insincerity a mile away usually and a happy face does not mean a happy person. I can also vouch for all coaches I met that none feel anyone should “appear” in any other way. The gist of coaching is to align who you are in society with yourself at a very deep level that matches your inner values. At least, that’s the coaching I do.

There are always black sheep in every industries. There are always dim-light souls willing to ride on whatever fad to make a buck but for every one of these people there are hundreds of qualified and honest ones. I feel this post does a great job at exposing the problem of how some people just tag the title “Coach” next to their names. But a tag or a sticker doesn’t replace experience, education and positive client feedback, something I am proud to achiever more of every day.

To read another in depth comment on this, read the coach connection blog.